Making A Change

Well my friends, I feel it's time for me to step back and refuel.  I've felt for a while that something needed to change about this blog.  I believe it needs change from within, which means my being refreshed and renewed.  That is the only way I can be of help to those of you that so faithfully read these posts.  I've always taken the writings on here very seriously and tried to remain transparent in all of them, in hopes that something would be said to help you in your journey. 

Will I be back?  I sure hope so.  Although I will miss sharing with you, when I do return, hopefully it will be with better perspective, deeper understanding, greater love, and overall personal growth.  That is certainly my prayer.

Thanks to all of you that have visited and still keep coming back to this blog periodically.  You're support, insight, encouraging words, and love have been amazing!  I still can't believe its been 5 years already.  Wow!
You are truly my inspiration!!

Many Thanks,

Michelle  
                                                                                      

                                                                                               

Wisdom's Power

The person who has wisdom usually looks something like this:

· they put God first in their life

· they're loving

· faithful

· know right from wrong

· listen and learn

· they possess knowledge and discretion

· they hate pride, arrogance, and bad behavior

· they give good advice and have common sense

· they love correction and are teachable when receiving it

· respect and fear God

· trust God

Keeping these characteristics in mind, the benefits that come to this individual look a lot like this:

· divine protection

· favor with God and people

· they are successful

· they have a reputation for good judgment

· they are known to be calm and peaceable

· understanding

· constant learning, which leads to honor and riches

Proverbs 3 talks about wisdom.  Verse 21 encourages us to preserve sound judgment and discernment.  It says, "do not let them out of your sight; they will be life for you, an ornament to grace your neck."  In learning about wisdom, I've heard alot about the importance of having discernment.  I never gave much thought to sound judgment.  Honestly, I thought they were the same thing.  But they're not. 

So what's the difference?  Discernment/discretion is the ability given by God to help us make the right choices in life.  Sound judgment is given by God only to those that follow Him.  It basically takes discernment a step further.  It includes the knowledge that comes from learning, training, and discipline, and the insight that comes from knowing and applying God's truths.  (Life Application Study Bible Commentary)  Never regret going to Sunday School!  You DID learn. And if you haven't already, now is the time to apply those truths to your life.  I've seen lots of good hearted, smart individuals fall into pits from making choices that were hurtful.  I've not only seen it, I've done it.  Wisdom is powerful!  I need it.  You need it.  Having it is a daily process for me; one that I never want to abandon.  Sound judgment keeps our feet from stumbling into dark areas that displease God, and when we lie down at night, we can be sure that our sleep will be sweet and we will not be afraid. We don't have to settle for making another hurtful choice.  Pray for sound judgment.  God wants to keep us from falling into snares.  He wants us strong and full of vitality.  I'm going for it.  I'm pursuing it as if my life depends on it.  Because it does.   

Glancing Back

Shortly after marriage, in my young and eager mind, I thought for sure we'd be on the road in full time ministry, with no hiccups and plenty of support.  I was so naive.  I knew nothing about marriage, ministry,  or raising a family.  All I knew how to do was pray for miracles and I wasn't too good at that.  My faith was weak in alot of areas and I had no idea that adversity was what I needed to make it strong.  I hated anything that rocked the boat or caused any kind of confrontation.  I always wanted to blend in, just go with the flow.  I'd still rather do that sometimes but the difference now is the fact that life happened and I've been through enough to know that standing up and showing courage causes change.  At least in myself, it has.

Seven months into our lives together, we found out I was expecting.  We both cried for 3 days before we told a soul.  I honestly think we were in shock.  Totally unexpected.  My sweet hubby told me he felt like God was asking him to take a step of faith in leaving his secular job and going into full time ministry.  Talk about scared to death.  Can you go in shock while you're still in shock, cause I think I did.  The adversity that followed was unbelievable.  From financial difficulties, spiritual disciplines, family and friend separation...it was HARD.  Once our daughter was born, we seemed to settle into life with more ease.  She was such a gift from God.  And still is.  And the ministry calendar was actually staying pretty full by this time but God spoke again and changed our world.  We had such a desire to stay with a group of people, help them with their christian walk, and be a part of a body of believers.  Finally, we got an opportunity to pastor.  Wow, more adversity followed. 

Thing is, with every new level of adversity, there was a new level of courage.  It wasn't just our own tenancity or stubborness, although we had plenty of that for God to work with.  And boy did He!  He worked us over, inside and out, as many times as it took for us to learn it was HIM that would have all honor and HIS plan would always be the better one.  God was trying to teach us how to walk in balance.  He had a tough job and He's still teaching us 21 years later.  

My point in this?  Adversity hurts.  It brings out our ugly everytime. But it allows us to learn who God really is and how good He is at doing His work.  Its not good for us to be wise in our own eyes.  That brings Him shame and causes us to lose favor.  The only thing we should be shunning is evil, not adversity.  Allow all things in life (hard and easy) to be the catalyst of your learning more as God guides you through each one.  He doesn't stop being awesome at any point.  

It's Settled

Then Naomi said, "Wait, my daughter, until you find out what happens.  For the man will not rest until the matter is settled today." -Ruth 3:18

Talk about rocking his world!  Ruth was looking for a savior and Boaz was looking at her.  What a combo!  Even in the face of this shaky economy and overall gloominess that looms over our nation, there are those looking to make a difference in the lives of others.  And we are promised in God's Word that He will make our feet like hinds feet.  We can overcome the things that overwhelm us.  Its not only in God's heart to settle the matter today but He places the same measure of urgency in the hearts of his servants, to make sure things are not left null and void in your life.  Yes, you have to do something too.  YOU have to take the first step.  Ruth was willing to take the most humble position available but Boaz specifically told his servants over her, not to embarrass Ruth AND to leave things in her path that would help.  He was watching to rescue her from the very beginning.  She showed integrity and he made sure it was rewarded.  Right there in the low place where she found herself living and struggling. 

You don't have to be rich to make things happen.  You don't have to be well known.  You have to be courageous and willing to work at it.  Personally, I have watched my husband become such a man as this over the past 7 years.  Well, he's never been afraid to rock the boat.  I LOVE that about him.  He's no coward by any means.  I've seen people ridicule him, yes, to his face but mostly behind his back because he calls it like it really is.  He's been unsure of many things concerning our family but never afraid to step into the unknown for fear of embarrassment or failure.  And lately it seems almost on a weekly basis, he is required to handle challenges that are more like traps.  But God placed the tenacity inside his heart that causes him to keep working, to keep trying, even when the respect he deserves is not shown.  So I wait, and look to find out what happens.  God will not rest until matters are settled.  That makes my heart sing at such a loud volume!  Because, just like Ruth and Boaz, the rest of the story is one of such beauty and great lineage, there is no reason for you and I to expect anything less. 

Life on the Hill

Here's an update of life over the past few months.  We've been drilled on how important it is to breathe deeply during a run so plenty of oxygen gets to the muscles. This running journey has turned out to be quite the highway.  But I'm learning ALOT.  Like with the breathing...one of the trainers was doing trigger point therapy on my leg and suddenly he was right in my face saying rather loudly "Breathe!" "Just breathe".  Okay, well I didn't realize I was holding my breath.  But doing so was hindering the therapy.  Thus, my first experience, and somewhat embarrassing lesson in Breathing.  I still haven't figured out how to do it like a normal human should when they're running. 

We finally covered a subject that seemed like a good alternative...Rest.  After spending a couple of weeks fussing over injured ankles, man was I frustrated.  It must have been hard to live with me.  My family is awesome, btw.  And they put up with alot of moaning and groaning, and LOTS of pouting.  Yeah, another embarrassing lesson.  Finally one of the trainers told me to take 4 days rest and do nothing but R.I.C.E. treatment. (Rest, Ice, Compression, Elevation).  Oh I pouted some more. Lo and behold, it worked.  We were then drilled on the importance of Rest days.  They told us those days are just as important as Running days because that's when your muscles have a chance to recover and build themselves up in preparation for the next run.  So it finally started to make sense to me.  Breathe deeply = Good.  Run = Hard but Fun.  Rest = Very Good.  Posture =  Heaven help me, I can slump with the best of them.  Oh I almost forgot, Nutrition = I don't have a clue.  But I know almonds are a good thing to have around. And water is a commandment. Non-negotiable.


Its not as scary anymore, well except for a few hills here and there.  And some dogs. And looney tune drivers that aren't watching for pedestrians.  Other than that, its going great and without further injury.  But even more importantly is the spiritual connection being made.  God enjoys running and He talks alot when I'm listening.  The same concepts that apply to my physical being also apply to my spiritual being.  When I'm frustrated,a good deep breath helps me relax.  When I rest, the burdens don't seem so heavy and bothersome.  When I'm hydrated with God's word, I feel stronger, more like the light I'm suppose to be.


I really want to do this thing called Healthy.  Spiritually, physically, and mentally. So I've eaten a few hills for breakfast.  And I like it.

Well I Heard...

Folks love to talk.  No doubt about it.  Whether they have justifiable grounds to speak about someone seems to be at their own discretion.  Mention the Bible and what it has to say...Boom!  You've become one of those religious people that thinks they're holier than thou.  One thing is clear; slander hurts.  Doesn't matter if its true or untrue, it still hurts.  Wait a minute, I never slandered anyone you say.  Maybe passed along some info to a friend about another friend but never slandered a soul.  Really?  Is there a difference?  Gossip- rumor or report of an intimate nature. Slander- defame, to harm the reputation of by libel. Old Webster has differentiated for us but looks like Jesus has another thing to say.  "So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets." (Matt 7:12) Ever been the subject of others gossip?  Not fun. Whoever goes about slandering reveals secrets; therefore do not associate with a simple babbler. (Prov 20:19)  Secular thinking doesn't detail much of a difference between the two words and Christian belief is one that says no difference. Bottom line, it is usually done with the intention of causing harm to someone's character. 

If you have been the source of slander, its time to change your course.  First thing, repent of all wrongdoing on your part, make amends with individuals in situations where that is possible, and ask the HolySpirit to help you guard your heart and mind.  Trust me, your mouth will follow whatever your mind and heart are filled with. 

If you have been the subject of slander, its time to change your course as well.  You don't have to walk around in defeat and sadness because of things done and said about you.  Pick up that chin and smile!  Its very liberating.  Don't allow it to be a source of oppression for you.  God doesn't like it anymore than you do but He can use it to help you grow. Live Strong in the power of His Might.

Journal Entry

After a couple of flooding days here in Pensacola, we are back in business.  I can't imagine what is going on underground in our sewer system but every time you drive up to a stop sign, you can hear the water rushing by underneath the streets.  Please continue to pray for the many families that had homes and vehicles flooded.  Not everyone has great insurance so there are quite a few people with damage and not enough resources to fix the situation. My family was very fortunate and had no damage.   As Solomon said to the Lord,  "You have shown great kindness to your servant", I say Amen! 

My boys have been gone for a few days to spend time with grandparents and it's crazy quiet in the house. But in a good, relaxing way.  The past few months have been passing right by us and leaving my head in a spin so the summer slowdown is very welcoming.  Somehow, we've still not taken the kids to the beach.  It's a 20 minute drive for goodness sakes so it seems like we could swing it.  'Maybe next week' has got to stop coming out of my mouth. 

I'm thankful how God provides so well.  Right down to the things you whisper deep inside, not realizing that an ear is listening.  And He answers.  Totally amazing every single time.  How awesome are your deeds Lord.  You continue to preserve our lives and sing over us with songs of love and joy.  May our lives continue to be rewritten by your mercies on a daily basis. 

Amazed

It's April already?? I feel like I've been in a time bubble. Guess I've been at a loss for words again but you have not been forgotten. I think of you often and hope you will check back very soon for more posts. The words will come again. Until then my friends,

It's Official!

2012...still trying to grasp that fact. Overall, I'm glad because it feels good to be getting a fresh start. Have you ever had such a full heart that words seemed empty to try to describe it? That was me at Christmas. It was absolutely wonderful, being able to spend the time with my family. They are the best gifts by far. Well I didn't think I had any resolutions for the new year but I've had to rethink that position. Two things that stand out in my mind...changing course and running. And not those put together. It's hard to think about the new year without looking back over the past one and with that comes good and bad. Last year was a difficult one. I learned a few good lessons about being merciful to others..harder lesson to learn than I thought. I also spent most of the year in a spiritual desert. Too much dry without an oasis. I don't want this year to be a repeat. That's why I'm all about changing course. And I'm not talking about a dry that going to church will fix so don't go and think all that religious stuff on me. Shake yourself, stay with me. Church don't fix everything. And being married to the pastor doesn't fix it either. There are times, seasons, places that you will walk alone. Not without Christ but apart from other people. And no, I'm not through with this season. But I'm determined its not gonna take me another year to clear this hurdle. If I'm to learn nothing else from it, it will be that the merciful shall obtain mercy.
I'm also learning to open my heart to new friendships. I've had many through the years that were so depleting; I think it made me somewhat of a recluse toward new relationships. Shame on me right? I know, it IS a shame and I'm the one paying for it. One thing though, pressing the delete button on a few relationships has been good. I believe in reciprocal living and if the love and kindness I give can't be reciprocated, then I say hey, its been a journey and I'll see you when I see you. So I begin this new year with the hope of finding new friendships that will be uplifting for all involved. Oh and running. A passion that has been buried far too long. This year its gonna happen. Thanks to my husband for his great support and the quiet voice of the Holyspirit encouraging me; it's taking shape and becoming a reality in my life.
2012 is looking powerful and very promising. A welcome change. I leave this post with the words of an awesome song that I want to carry in my thoughts and prayers throughout the year:

Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like You have loved me
Break my heart for what breaks yours
Everything I am for your Kingdom's cause
As I walk from earth into eternity -Hosanna, Hillsong United